Birthday Cards

Happy or crappy, if you don’t send a card are you even shitshow besties?

Presenting the humble yet hilarious birthday card - cheaper than a present and without the wrapping headache, our cards might not say "Happy Birthday" but they will definitely make one. (Because, not to labour the point, some of them are really very funny cards, and the others are just spanking lovely).

  • A white rectangular card with a sloth in a crown and funny text saying "Sloth was checking out his bum. Oh no that is not a good ass, said sloth. THAT IS A BADASS! And off he merrily trot"

    Badass

    Badass

    Zeppelinmoon
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
  • White rectangular card with black text saying: "Every woman's dream is to find a man that will take her in his arms, throw her on the bed and clean the entire house while she sleeps."

    Woman's Dream

    Woman's Dream

    Holy Flaps
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
  • A white rectangular card with two blue tits and funny text saying "my tits will not be calmed"

    Calm Tits

    Calm Tits

    Zeppelinmoon
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
  • White rectangular card with black text saying: "Me: I'm the most easy-going person ever. Also me: What kind of clown loaded the dishwasher like this?!"

    Dishwasher

    Dishwasher

    Holy Flaps
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
  • White rectangular card with funny black text saying: "I love it when my kids sigh. Like what ails you my little unemployed freeloader. "

    Freeloader

    Freeloader

    Holy Flaps
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
  • White rectangular card with black text saying: "Somewhere, somebody out there is thinking of you and the tremendous impact you made on their life. It's not me. I think you're a twat."

    Somewhere

    Somewhere

    Holy Flaps
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
  • Positive Greeting Card

    Positive Greeting Card

    Positive Greeting Card

    Cloud Nine
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
  • White rectangular card with watercolour illustrated capybara wearing y-fronts with an intense expression and insistennt eyebrows and handwriting that says "is it your birfday? Michael isn't sure because he is a capybara, and he never kept a calendar. Also, he doesn't care either way."

    Capybara Greetings Card

    Capybara Greetings Card

    Zeppelinmoon
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
  • Purple rectangular card with gold foiled text saying: I don't mean to show off but I finished my 14-day diet in 3 hours & 10 minutes."

    Show Off

    Show Off

    Cloud Nine
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
  • Bright red rectangular card with gold foiled text saying: " We're going to need more candles."

    More Candles

    More Candles

    Cloud Nine
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
  • Green rectangular card with funny pink foiled text saying: "Life is not a fairytale. If you lose your shoe at midnight , you're drunk"

    Fairy Tale

    Fairy Tale

    Cloud Nine
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
  • A white rectangular card with a group of cats having a funny conversation about what a french cat would say

    French Cat

    French Cat

    Zeppelinmoon
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
               
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