Birthday Cards

Happy or crappy, if you don’t send a card are you even shitshow besties?

Presenting the humble yet hilarious birthday card - cheaper than a present and without the wrapping headache, our cards might not say "Happy Birthday" but they will definitely make one. (Because, not to labour the point, some of them are really very funny cards, and the others are just spanking lovely).

  • A white rectangular card with a cute hand illustrated tortoise with an ice cream cone as a hat and funny text saying "By the time tortoise had got back from the shop, his fucking ice cream had all melted. He was pleased with his funky new hat tho."

    Tortus

    Tortus

    Zeppelinmoon
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
  • White rectangular card with funny black text saying: "I love it when my kids sigh. Like what ails you my little unemployed freeloader. "

    Freeloader

    Freeloader

    Holy Flaps
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
  • Purple rectangular card with gold foiled text saying: "I think I may need professional help. A chef, a butler and a maid should do it."

    Help

    Help

    Cloud Nine
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
  • A white rectangular card with two sloths having a funny conversation about how cheese is the only food group

    Cheese

    Cheese

    Zeppelinmoon
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
  • White rectangular card with funny black text saying: "I want to enter the room with the energy of a cat. " Is there anything I can fuck up or eat in here? Nah? Well anyway, you're lucky to have me."

    Cat Energy

    Cat Energy

    Holy Flaps
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
  • White rectangular card with black text saying: " I can't believe how old people my age are."

    How Old

    How Old

    Holy Flaps
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
  • A white rectangular card with two blue tits and funny text saying "my tits will not be calmed"

    Calm Tits

    Calm Tits

    Zeppelinmoon
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
  • A white rectangular card with and funny text saying "'The shitshow must go on!"

    Silly Shit

    Silly Shit

    Zeppelinmoon
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
  • Potatoes

    Potatoes

    Potatoes

    Cloud Nine
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
  • Bright yellow rectangular card with funny gold foiled text saying: "It's all shits & giggles until someone giggles & shits."

    Giggles

    Giggles

    Cloud Nine
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
  • A white rectangular card with a cute hand illustrated watercolour style conversation saying " ' please don’t swear in front of my parents' 'okey doke' 'hallo old fuckers'"

    Don't Swear

    Don't Swear

    Zeppelinmoon
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
  • Turquoise rectangular card with gold foiled text saying: "How the hell did we get this old?"

    This Old

    This Old

    Cloud Nine
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
               
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