Studies have shown that intelligent people swear more than stupid motherfuckers. If you’re fond of a NSFW word you’re in the right place. Offensive. Rude. You’re welcome.

  • A blue card with colourful rounded text saying "It's your birthday! You know what that means… Butt stuff."

    Butt stuff

    Butt stuff

    Betiobca
    £3.50 GBP
    £3.50 GBP £3.50 GBP
  • A textured grey card with the handwritten words "Happy Birthday piss flaps"

    Piss flaps

    Piss flaps

    Sooshichacha
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
  • White rectangular card with black text saying: "I love that when I'm with you I don’t have to pretend to be a nice person. That shit's exhausting."

    Exhausting

    Exhausting

    Holy Flaps
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
  • A white rectangular card with a hand illustrated stoat in a small pair of jeans and funny text saying "stoat spent all his wages on new jeans. Fuck, thought stoat, now he could not pay his rent. But, damn he felt fine in his fancy jeans"

    Stoat

    Stoat

    Zeppelinmoon
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
  • A white rectangular card with a sloth in multiple different poses and funny text saying "the key to survival is to stun every other fucker with the awesome essense of you"

    Awesome Sloth

    Awesome Sloth

    Zeppelinmoon
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
  • White rectangular card with black text saying: "My four moods I'm too old for this shit. I'm too tired for this shit. I'm too sober for this shit. I don't have time for this shit"

    Four Moods

    Four Moods

    Holy Flaps
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
  • Textured square blue card with handwritten words saying "Your new colleagues will be proper shit compared to us."

    Your new colleagues will be proper shit

    Your new colleagues will be proper shit

    Sooshichacha
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
  • White rectangular card with black text saying: "Marriage. Because your shitty day doesn’t have to end at work."

    Marriage

    Marriage

    Holy Flaps
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
  • White rectangular card with black text saying: "No-one has more shit on their to-do list than a kid who's just been told it's bedtime"

    Bedtime

    Bedtime

    Holy Flaps
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
  • White rectangular card with funny black text saying: "I want to enter the room with the energy of a cat. " Is there anything I can fuck up or eat in here? Nah? Well anyway, you're lucky to have me."

    Cat Energy

    Cat Energy

    Holy Flaps
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
  • White rectangular card with black text saying: " When things seem especially rough just ask yourself "Did I shit my pants today?" If the answer is no, you're doing alright. "

    Pants

    Pants

    Holy Flaps
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
  • White rectangular card with black text saying: "Chin up. Tits out. Onwards."

    Onwards

    Onwards

    Holy Flaps
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP