The cards that will milk your giggle glands with a cast iron grip. Buckle up bitchlings, your pelvic floor is about to get a workout.

  • A blue square card with a funny cartoon of a brown rabbit reading the book watership down and a little thought bubble with the words "Fucking hell!!!"

    Watership downer

    Watership downer

    Ustudio
    £3.50 GBP
    £3.50 GBP £3.50 GBP
  • White rectangular card with black text saying: "Chin up. Tits out. Onwards."

    Onwards

    Onwards

    Holy Flaps
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
  • A white rectangular card with a cute hand illustrated manatee with a red bikini on and funny text saying "manatee did not worry about getting her body ready for the beach. Instead she hollered at the beach 'are you ready for ME?' the sea lowwered his sunglasses, smiled and said 'you betcha baby'" , with a kraft brown envelope.

    You Betcha

    You Betcha

    Zeppelinmoon
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
  • A white rectangular card with a cat in an ugly wool jacket and funny text saying "cat wanted to go out and play with his gang-mate, but he ahd been put in some sort of hectic wool jacket, which was fucking with his street cred. soon, thought cat, i shall piss in it. "

    Piss Cat

    Piss Cat

    Zeppelinmoon
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
  • White rectangular card with black text saying: "I hate it when people ask me what I did yesterday. I don't know, I breathed a lot. Probably got mad at something… sighed heavily. The list goes on."

    Sighed

    Sighed

    Holy Flaps
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
  • White rectangular card with black text saying: "A recent study found people who take their coffee black are more likely to exhibit psychopathic traits. And people who order a quad shot, non fat, vanilla soy, extra foam, light whip with caramel drizzle are more likely to be their victims."

    Quad Shot

    Quad Shot

    Holy Flaps
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
  • White rectangular card with black text saying: "If cats could text back, they wouldn't."

    Cats

    Cats

    Holy Flaps
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
  • White rectangular card with black text saying: "You are pretty fucking awesome. Keep that shit up."

    Awesome

    Awesome

    Holy Flaps
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
  • White rectangular card with black text saying: "And she gave no fucks. Not even one. And she lived happily ever after. The end."

    The End

    The End

    Holy Flaps
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
  • Purple rectangular card with gold foiled text saying: "I think I may need professional help. A chef, a butler and a maid should do it."

    Help

    Help

    Cloud Nine
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
  • White rectangular card with black text saying: "I love that when I'm with you I don’t have to pretend to be a nice person. That shit's exhausting."

    Exhausting

    Exhausting

    Holy Flaps
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP
  • A white rectangular card with a hand illustrated stoat in a small pair of jeans and funny text saying "stoat spent all his wages on new jeans. Fuck, thought stoat, now he could not pay his rent. But, damn he felt fine in his fancy jeans"

    Stoat

    Stoat

    Zeppelinmoon
    £3.00 GBP
    £3.00 GBP £3.00 GBP